Team work

8 September 2012

I got out~~!  I spent the morning on a soccer sideline watching a first time coach (my dear husband) and daughters during their games.  All but one girl (my daughter) had played on this team last year.    Before she got there, she saw her old coach and team first and started crying almost uncontrollably.  "I can't play today.  I don't want to play soccer.  I have a cold."  She grabbed around my waist like she did when she was petrified at four years old.  After greeting her old coach and telling her teammates how much she missed them, but that she was playing with her school team,  it was time for the new start.  (Granted, her grip on my hand was firmly secure.)

After five tissues to wipe tears and nose runs, I introduced her to her coach and let her go.  I let her go.  No swooping in to save the day.  It wasn't my day.  I let her go and learn her own strength.  It only took a couple friendly faces to settle her nerves.  It's tough letting go of the old and saying hello to the new.  Then, the chemistry of a team, their rituals, their work done together, and character building in learning acceptance all begin again as the players rub off on one another.

Have you ever been on a team or had to switch teams?  It could be anything from sports, choir, work, school.  The hospital team each brought their special skills that made and continues to make my recovery better and better each day.  They respected one another, asked for input, leaned on each other and learned from who offered each gift.  And my steady recovery is a direct result f their work.

Teams are hardest, when people don't carry their weight, don't show up, or don't contribute on the team.  Rumors start, feelings are hurt, damage and chaos in sue, and destruction is soon to follow.

Later in the afternoon, some of the players came over to our house.  Watching the girls come together in their playing in the back yard as well as coming apart when there was a squabble, and then back together was a process.  Learning how a team works means learning compromise, negotiating, listening, saying sorry and I forgive you (and mean it) all builds up these kids' lives.  It's not about the game, it's learning how to treat each other in the world.  Learning courage and kindness as central parts of teamwork.

My work team continues to be incredibly supportive as I take time off for recovery.  The support, encourage, cover, and tell me I am wanted and needed after the recovery.  I feel like a wild horse chomping at the bit to get back too soon.  It takes all my husbands strength to try and rein me in at times.  Shower chair goes back, no more pain medication, stamina markedly better each day, and the fog of anesthesia is lifting.

Think about teams you are involved in and what makes them work?  What makes them click?  What makes them self-destruct? How do you welcome new people on your team or say goodbye to those who must leave?  What would you make time for if your team needed it??